Money Conflicts?

Money's one of the main causes of conflict in relationships. Living on the breadline is bound to cause tension - but, often the biggest problems aren't down to a lack of cash, but how to spend what you have.

If you and your partner have the same attitude towards money, the only thing you need to agree on is who's going to manage the income and expenditure.

If your attitudes are quite different, you'll need to agree on some basic budget priorities, such as how much money you'll spend on household essentials and bills, how much on leisure and entertainment, and how much you'll save.

However, if you find that no matter how hard you try to sort out your money differences you still end up arguing, perhaps money isn't the issue at all.

The traits that attract couples to each other can turn into the roots of conflict, says Susan Zimmerman, financial planner, therapist and author of "The Power in Your Money Personality." Common clashes about money often stem from not being able to relate to each other's opinions, not budging on one's beliefs, and not discussing each other's goals, expectations or priorities.
Here are questions couples should ask themselves, according to her book:

- How are you alike or different from each other?

- Do you clash?

- How do you handle conflicts or indecisions about money?

- Do you talk - yell - lie - avoid - sneak - compromise?

- What would you like to change or improve?

Couples can resolve their issues if they set mutual goals based on a willingness to spend time on the matters, adopting a give-and- take attitude, focusing on the partnership and an understanding that they will have differing viewpoints and styles.